Tuesday, June 19, 2012

PART 2: Once was a dirty fagger

I've had to come back overnight to write the update this one. WOW what a day. SOoo I got to the hypnotherapist and smoked like 5 ciggies on the way. Grosse, but feeling a little sad (weirdly) that they would be my last cigarettes. The Hypnosis experience itself was very calming. Before the session the doctor went into great detail about the health effects of smoking and exactly what it does to your body. He asked that I do several things to help the process be more successful which includes abstaining from chocolate and caffeine for three weeks. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA????? He wants me to quit chocolate too? No-one said that this was part of the deal..... Once I agreed, reluctantly, he sat me in the typical 'hypnosis chair' and began talking some serious mumbojumbo. Five minutes later - done! wollah! cured! or was I???? Did anything happen just then? Was I hypnotised? Did it work? 

I'm not sure. I haven't had a cigarette yet and I'm trying not to be skeptical. I left the doctor's feeling pretty good but I was hoping I'd be disgusted by the smell of stale cigarette smoke lingering in my car. Nope. Crap. I don't think it worked. 
I feel that I'm requiring a lot more strength and willpower than I thought I would. I know that I need to allow my body to detox but I kind of wish it would be easier. I had to remove myself from public interaction last night as I could feel myself on edge, snappy and short with both my housemate and my boyfriend. I had a really bad nights sleep with restless legs which I believe is a result of craving tobacco. It will go it will go. I have to keep telling myself this. 

Anyway, I know this update is all over the place, a bit scattered and perhaps ill-logic but that is exactly how my head is feeling at the moment. I am sure it will clear - without me requiring a cigarette. 

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